Pushy Adoptive Mother Hopes Asian Will Pay Dividends

Mill Castle, NY - Peggy Sue Brimbell, 46, saw her 1999 adoption of Soon Kim from China as an investment. "Three words: Michelle Wie & 401-k," said a laughing Brimbell to reporters while vigorously "coaching" her "daughter."

"She's got a lot of talent," said Brimbell of Kim, "but she tends to slice right off the tee. Nothin' some late nights at the range won't fix though."

When asked if she enjoyed golf, the 8-year-old Kim mechanically replied "I like the golf very much," after receiving a stern glare of permission from her adopted caretaker.

Reports that Brimbell has denied Kim her rightful education were not commented on by the mother/coach - "That's a bunch of B.S. She gets 2-4 hours of home schooling everyday between Montel and [Dr.] Phil. I really wish people would just leave me alone and let my investment appreciate away from the spotlight."

Public officials have promised an investigation into the neglectful treatment that Brimbell appears to be instilling upon Kim, but one representative from the local department of health and family services was quoted as saying "we've got a lot of non-golf prodigies out there to worry about before I'm going to dig through the papers on my desk and help out some future millionaire. . . . I'm sick of every adopted kid always having their hand out wanting more."