Vertically Challenged B-Baller Pulls off "Jimmy Dolan Shake-n-Bake"

Gueverrez, Mexico - In a stunning display of athleticism, Victor Ortega pulled off the impossible on Monday when he completed the "Jimmy Dolan Shake-n-Bake" on his defender, Alonzo Alvarez. The move, popularized by Kevin Bacon in the 1994 Disney film "The Air Up There" stunned onlookers. "I can't believe it. Not since Bacon has it been done," said basketball commentator Dick Vitale. "And his legs are so small, baby!!" added Vitale.

Others weren't so impressed, including the embarassed defender, Alvarez: "Is everyone crazy? Did they see what I saw? There's nothing to that damn move. You stand in one spot and switch legs and then crossover dribble. Kevin Bacon could do it for Christ's sake!"

Ortega blew off Alvarez's comments, saying that he was just upset because he got "show'd up like a white dude on an And1 mix tape." Ortega went on, "Dolan (Bacon) was awesome. He won that game in Africa and saved the village from losing its land because of the shake-n-bake. I'd like to think that I helped my people out by using it too."

Ortega is leading the Mexican Midget Basketball League (MMBL) with 11.2 points per game and 0.8 rebounds. Alvarez, a modest bench player usually known for his defensive prowess which has been likened to Randy Brown of the Chicago Bulls second three-peat teams, is averaging 0.4 ppg.

Kevin Bacon (below left) could not be reached for comment.