Monday, March 20, 2006

Gonzaga Star Denies Meth Addiction in Wake of Recent espn.com Photo



Spokane, WA - Gonzaga Bulldog Adam Morrison has vehemently denied an alleged addiction to meth amphetamines, or, in street terminology, "ice." The allegations came in the wake of a seemingly innocent photo posted of the NCAA season scoring average leader in which he appears crazed, sleep-deprived and all-around bizarre.

"I don't do meth. Period." That was the answer given by Morrison at a pre-shootaround interview session at the Gonzaga practice facility earlier this morning.

Morrison's head coach is behind him as well: "Frahm, I mean Dickau, I mean Santangelo, (expletive) whoever he is, he does not do meth," says Mark Few, the winniest coach in the NCAA over the past five years.

So how did he build up such a great team out of a bunch of meth users? "Listen, I just denied that he does drugs," replied a noticeably flustered Few. "Drugs are not something to be taken lightly in this country." So is that why Morrison skipped directly to the hard stuff? "This interview is over" were the only words that a guilty Few could mutter.

While Morrison has been heralded for his courageous fight with diabetes - even injecting himself with insulin on the sideline sometimes - Balco's Victor Conte, made famous by his role of steroid supplier to Barry Bonds and Jose Canseco, tells a different story: "That's not insulin," claims Conte. "I know because I sold him those needles myself - they're full of liquid meth."

The NCAA has skirted requests for a more stringent meth-testing policy, claiming that although meth is a growing problem throughout the United States, there is no reason to believe that the epidemic has reached NCAA student athletes. To that statement, Conte claims the NCAA need only look as far as the Gonzaga sideline - or a photo from Morrison's freshman year at Gonzaga. (bottom left)



"Much like steroids, the effects of meth show up over time," says Conte," just as you can find a 1990 Donruss rookie card of Barry Bonds to tell you he's on the juice, a freshman dorm photo of Morrison tells you much the same."

1 Comments:

At 10:23 PM, Blogger BrianLaesch.com said...

Wait, Adam Morrison does meth? Holy shit! (my fake response)

http://www.hollywoodca.blogspot.com

 

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